Ranting from the Heights

Keep your hands out of my cookie jar!

2009-02-04T16:54:00.004-05:00

First off...

I do not like stimulus plans.

Anything that involves the government putting us in more debt or wasting our money is generally something that I am against.

That being said, if we have to have a stimulus package that is worth almost 1 Trillion dollars... it damn well better do its job. What is the purpose of the stimulus bill?

To create jobs in the United States of America.

Create jobs in China? No.
Japan? No.
Europe? NO!
For the love of God, the purpose of it is to create American jobs. To stimulate the AMERICAN economy. That is why our government in all of its wisdom is putting us and our future children in debt to pay for this plan. That is why in the bill it stated that U.S. taxpayer money was to be spent on U.S. goods and services to create.. wait for it... U.S. jobs! *Gasp!* what a concept.

So what the problem is?

The international community just could not handle that we would create a bill to stimulate our economy (with taxpayer dollars) and want to spend that money on U.S. goods and services. How DARE we?

They say we are being protectionist. Protectionism being the act of restraining trade between nations, through methods such as tariffs on imported goods, restrictive quotas, and a variety of other restrictive government regulations designed to discourage imports, and prevent foreign take-over of local markets and companies.

Yet we are not suggesting trade be restricted, nor tariffs be created, nor quotas be enacted. The stimulus would be a subsidy to be sure, but even the Europeans are spending their own stimulus money on their own industries.

Point being, we do not tell other countries how to handle their own stimulus measures. It is about time the butt out of ours.

Peace.

Proposition 8

2008-12-10T16:12:00.006-05:00

Uh oh's....

a controversial topic.

I will attempt to lay out my thoughts succinctly. Well, how about with limited verbosity?

What is Proposition 8?

It was a California State ballot measure.
The ballot measure was an amendment that would override portions of the ruling of In re Marriage Cases.[16] The Constitution, as proposed by the measure, would include a new section (Section 7.5) to Article I, placing it between the state Equal Protection clause and nondiscrimination in business and the professions. The new section reads:

Only marriage between a man and a woman is valid or recognized in California.

California's State Constitution put the measure into immediate effect on November 5, the day after the election.

Whats that mean?

If you are gay... no marriage for you. But you can have civil unions. This would only affect California though.

Whats the big deal?

Well you see... if you were gay, before this measure passed you could get married...

Proposition 8
(as of November 26, 2008, 1:48 pm PST)[2]
Votes Percentage
Yes 6,838,107 52.3%
No 6,246,463 47.7%
Blank votes 296,462 N/A
Total votes cast and counted 13,412,761[3] 100.00%
Voter turnout 77.5%

Now if you are gay, you can not get married. It would also invalidate all previous marriages that had occurred between gay couples. So if you are gay, you are probably pretty pissed and not married anymore.

This proposition was pushed through by a coalition of religious organizations. Now to the good part...

My take on it

This is a civil rights issue.

Wait nooo..... marriage is between one man and one woman, the Bible tells me so! Thats great and all that the New Testament supports that general idea, but California is not a Constitutional theocracy. Nor is its constitution the Bible.

Its citizens are entitled to equal rights and that is what this issue is really about. Civil unions are not the same thing as marriage under state and federal law. This means those who are in a civil union do not share the same benefits as those who are married. This means a specific demographic (Gay California citizens) of the population are refused rights that all others enjoy.

So I say call it whatever you want, civil unions, marriage, permanent couples... whatever. But confer the same civil rights to all citizens.

Oh, and my thoughts on the religious groups that are complaining about gays being pissed at them... I do not buy in to that whole we are poor religious victims boohoo pity us nonsense. When you lobby to deny rights to your fellow citizens you cross the line from being an objective observer of politics to politically active citizens. If you are an active citizen who fights for legislation you better be willing to accept the blowback that occurs (legal of course) from your actions. Especially when it relates to citizen rights. Example: If some group pushes to deny a person marriage rights if they follow a certain religion, you should not be surprised when the victims of that legislation call out those who targeted them. It is the same principle here.

I get that some very religious types feel that the "word" marriage is being violated. But this proposition was not about a word, it was about the rights of citizens and denying them legal benefits that everyone else enjoys.

Steps to happiness

2008-10-28T16:47:00.000-04:00

Hokie or real, you decide

Connect
Developing relationships with family, friends, colleagues and neighbours will enrich your life and bring you support

Be active
Sports, hobbies such as gardening or dancing, or just a daily stroll will make you feel good and maintain mobility and fitness

Be curious
Noting the beauty of everyday moments as well as the unusual and reflecting on them helps you to appreciate what matters to you

Learn
Fixing a bike, learning an instrument, cooking – the challenge and satisfaction brings fun and confidence

Give
Helping friends and strangers links your happiness to a wider community and is very rewarding

Political Analysis 08

2008-06-03T11:19:00.007-04:00

It is time again to choose between evils again.

Every four years we get the honor of 'choosing' who our next president will be. We used to have a culture that pushed us to vote for the person we believed in. Now our culture dictates we vote for the person 'most likely to win'. We are taught that the only candidates likely to win come from the Democrat or Republican parties.

We (the people) do not choose the candidates for those parties. We could, but generally the party leadership decides beforehand the people they think would be acceptable. Then we just enjoy the illusion of deciding who gets to be the nominee for the party out of that preselected group. There have been exceptions to this trend in our history, but for the most part that is the way the system seems to work.

So who are we looking for this presidency?

The one on the way out...

Hillary Clinton

It appears that despite her late comeback she is on the way out. While she is close to Obama in citizen votes, she is losing to him in party leader ("superdelegate") votes. Perhaps the Democratic party does not want to be ruled by the Clinton's for the next four years.

Now to the very likely contenders...

In the Red Corner...

John McCain

The 'Maverick' Senator of Arizona.

Pros:
- Voted against the use of torture by the US military
- Was held in a concentration camp in Viet Nam and against sympathizes with war vets
- Knows the military and is familiar with wartime situations
- Experienced in politics, knows how to pass votes he needs to get through.
- Is not close to the fundamentalist religious right of the Republicans.

Cons:
- Will follow the Bush strategy of perpetual war in Iraq and preemptive war with Iran.
- Knows nothing about economics, will increase spending and further kill the economy. Our wars waste billions, spending money we dont have wastes billions, he would do both. He would tell you that three wars (Iran, Iraq and Afghanistan) and seven hundred military bases across the world are necessary to save us from the terrorists.
- Is a tool for lobbyists.
- Talks big talk on change, but really that change is not significant.
- He is really old!
- He makes bad choices in priestly allies. That is what he gets for trying to pander to an electorate he never cared about anyway.

If you do not like endless wars, he is not your guy. If you like sound fiscal policy he is not your guy. Personally I used to like him, but the more I have read about him the less I agree with just about everything he stands for.

In the Blue Corner...

Barak Obama

The Senator of 'Change'.

Pros:
- The slickest orator this side of Quintillian.
- Very likeable, smart and new to the political scene. Gives one the impression he has not bought into the system yet.
- Recognizes that some things need to change for the country to prosper.
- Has a decent understanding of the younger voters and their needs.
- Comes from a modest background.
- He sees that our foreign policy does not work and openly says he would try something new. Like... heaven forbid, talking to people and fostering alliances.
- He can pull off presidential very well.
- Foreign nations already love him. He could be our next JFK.

Cons:
- He may take longer to bring the troops home than he promises.
- Many of the people closest to him (wife and two pastors who were mentors) either revile the country or are pretty racist. While it is a persons right to have an opinion, it makes one wonder what influence they have on him. The thought is that he talks about seeing past divisions and unifying the country, but then surrounds himself with people who see only division. Bush promised to be a uniter as well.
- Will nearly quadruple government spending. This could very well break our economy. He has a history of being a runaway spender with taxpayer money.
- Despite his public statements to the contrary, he still tips his hat and makes nice with powerful lobby groups which have influenced our fiscal and foreign policy to the disasters they are today.
- He is an unknown quantity due to his lack of time in office. Will he be another Bush or the leader he presents himself to be? We do not know.

If you like sound money policy, he is not your guy. If you like small government, he is not your guy. Despite that I still like the promise he represents, which is a new direction in foreign policy.

Ultimately, both guys will bloat up the government even more. They will both cave to a point to special interests. The big difference I see is that one will spend all of our money on foreign wars and keep us hated worldwide. The other will spend all of our money at home and make us loved worldwide. Either way, we will become a much more bankrupt nation. So the way it looks to me at the moment, we can be broke and loved, or broke and hated.

Not too bad for a 13 year old

2008-03-07T11:27:00.001-05:00

Baby tiger don't be sad
Baby tiger they stole your dad

Your mommy was taken away from you
And your so young you do not no what to do

Your tiny roar fills the air
But still you no no one is there

Lost in the night your rage burns wild
It's hard to survive when you're only a child

The poachers will pay someday you promise
So when you stalk your prey remember this

The humans that hurt you and knocked you down
Shan't harm you anymore while I am around

Heather, age 13

Man eats his hands for fear they may be possessed!

2008-01-30T11:00:00.000-05:00

No not really, though I thought of this due to a recent event in Vermont. Apparently the town of Brattleboro decided to issue a non-enforceable petition to repudiate Bush and Cheney for violating the Constitution (big C not little c). The great thing is that some lovely citizens wrote to the council about that local petition. Lets look at one of the comments....

"The petition prompted Brent Caflisch to go to his computer in Rosemount, Minn. "Maybe the terrorists will do us all a favor and attack your town next, our country would be much safer with several thousand dead wackjobs in Vermont," he wrote.

It went on to say terrorists could kidnap the three Select Board members who voted in favor, "cut their heads off, video tape it and put it on the internet.""

Woah... theres a lot of glare coming off of that dome! Apparently there were many more (Approx 60) sent along this line of thinking. What does this petition actually say?

It reads thusly: "Shall the Selectboard instruct the Town Attorney to draft indictments against President Bush and Vice President Cheney for crimes against our Constitution, and publish said indictments for consideration by other authorities and shall it be the law of the Town of Brattleboro that the Brattleboro Police, pursuant to the above-mentioned indictments, arrest and detain George Bush and Richard Cheney in Brattleboro if they are not duly impeached, and prosecute or extradite them to other authorities that may reasonably contend to prosecute them?"

What basis do these people have to indict Bush and Cheney for crimes against the Constitution? Well... let us have a history lesson...

The presidential oath of office is located in Article II, Section 1, Clause 8 of the Constitution. Every president, and vice president must swear to it before the nation and god.

This part is pulled from the US National Archives, enjoy!
"The Presidential Oath of Office was set down in the Constitution by the Founding Fathers during the Constitutional Convention of 1787. The oath originally proposed was much shorter, requiring the President-elect to swear only to "faithfully execute the office of President of the United States." James Madison, a delegate to the Convention from Virginia, believed that the Chief Executive should be bound by oath to support the articles of the Union—the very document the Convention was struggling to create. Along with George Mason, another Virginia delegate, Madison proposed that the President also be made to swear to "preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the United States.""

So what does this all mean? It means the President, and his Vice President swore an oath of office and are expected to abide by that oath. The oath says they will Preserve, Protect and Defend, not simply one of those actions, but all of those actions. Though if Bush did not swear that oath then I guess he did not do anything wrong... oh wait...

I guess he did swear that oath.

Now every president is going to make mistakes, but it can be argued that this one actively violated that oath. One can argue about the Executive position lately on Due Process, Eminent Domain, First Amendment Freedoms, Fourth Amendment Rights, Sixth Amendment Right to Counsel and so on. Why am I saying all this? Simply to illustrate that this town council has a reason to issue such a petition. Whether one agrees with it or not.

So what pisses me off about this whole issue?

What the fuck are people thinking when they suggest that terrorists should come in and kill thousands of Americans? They claim to support Constitution devouring laws that Bush issues 'for our own safety'. Yet they want to violate Bush's intent to keep terrorists from killing Americans? This makes no sense. Also, since when does wanting to protect the constitution make one a friend of terrorists? I thought it was a very American thing to want to protect our freedom and our founding document of law. They like to argue that to protect freedom we need to give away our freedom. I find that to be an illogical statement.

Regardless of whether you agree with that Vermont town or not, I say try to use reason and abstain from wishing terrorist death upon your fellow citizens. Where has the capacity for logical rebuttal or civil disagreement gone? Fear of terrorism, fear in general, erodes an individuals capacity for clear thinking. Perhaps this serves as a lesson that this kind of illogical fear, which can drive people like Mr. Caflish to wish such heinous things up on his people, is still alive and in need of remedy.

Doggie Translators

2008-01-16T11:35:00.000-05:00

"The barks were tape recorded and then digitized on a computer, which used software to study their differences.

The computer correctly identified the different situations 43 per cent of the time. Although it was not a high success rate it was far better than human recognition, the researchers said.

The computer was most accurate in identifying the "fight" and "stranger" contexts, and was least effective at matching the "play" bark.

The results appear in the journal Animal Cognition, and suggest that dogs have acoustically different barks depending on their emotional state.

The researchers also performed a second test, in which the computer identified individual dogs by their bark.

The software correctly identified the dogs 52 per cent of the time, again much better than the human result, suggesting there are individual differences in barks even though humans are not able to recognize them.

The team also plans to compare the barks of different breeds to discover what they have in common. "

It does not apply to me

2008-01-10T14:09:00.000-05:00

Who wrote the following statement on February 12, 1779: “A general dissolution of principles and manners will more surely overthrow the liberties of America than the whole force of the common enemy. While the people are virtuous they cannot be subdued; but when once they lose their virtue then will be ready to surrender their liberties to the first external or internal invader”?

Samuel Adams wrote that.

What I find interesting is that the founding fathers all speak about liberties. The Constitution was designed to be interpreted via the intent of its makers. The founding fathers seemed to think that the greatest threat to America would not come from an external army or force, but from the peoples willingness to surrender their liberties. What is fascinating is that as a body, the nation does not feel that such ideas apply to them today.

"Thats a Wrap!"

2008-01-09T09:58:00.000-05:00

Burrito
Main Entry:
bur·ri·to Listen to the pronunciation of burrito
Pronunciation:
\bə-ˈrē-(ˌ)tō\
Function:
noun
Inflected Form(s):
plural bur·ri·tos
Etymology:
American Spanish, from Spanish, little donkey, diminutive of burro
Date:
1934

: a flour tortilla rolled or folded around a filling (as of meat, beans, and cheese)

Take a look at these burritos...

Did you say to yourself at any point, "thats not a burrito, thats a wrap!". You know why you did not say that, BECAUSE THERE IS NO SUCH FUCKING THING AS A WRAP! It is an artificial marketing term used to describe a burrito! A BURRITO! It is like the wrap is supposed to be some chic new menu item that no one ever thought of before. I am so special because I do not eat sandwiches, how vulgar. I eat wraps, like a civilized person. No you tard, you eat burritos.

Interestingly, the top one is supposed to be a wrap, and the bottom a burrito. But wait... whats this? They are both flour tortillas rolled or folded around some kind of filling... I wonder what they could be?

Come Again?

2008-01-07T09:59:00.000-05:00

I wonder how many people have had a conversation like this one.

Person: America is the greatest country ever. All other countries are number two or lower. That is why it is ok that we do whatever we want in the world, because we are the best country there is and thus we are always justified in our actions.

Me: Ok, point taken. Just our of curiosity, what makes the ole USofA so great? Do not get me wrong, I love this country too, but I want to understand where you are coming from in this opinion.

Person: The fact that we are more free than any other country in the world. Also, we are more prosperous than any other nation.

Me: Excellent! What makes us more free than say Canada?

Person: Our Constitution and the way this country was founded. Look at what we have done in the last 200 years that all these other nations have not. It is because we are more free.

Me: Cool, so you are against the Patriot Act, revocation of Habeas Corpus, torture and laws or actions by the government that violate the constitution.

Person: Well... no. All those things are ok because they are for our own protection against the terrorists.

Me: But... you just said that what sets us apart from everyone else was our freedom. Do you think taking away our individual liberties and violating the document they are based upon is diminishing what makes us great by your estimation?

Person: Well of course not, we have to win against the terrorists right? Sometimes you have to change the rules to win. Plus, the constitution is a little outdated anyhow.

Me: Wait... I thought you said that our freedom is what makes us great. How does being less free establish your position?

Person: Why do you hate this country so much? If you do not like it why not just move somewhere else?

Me: I think you are diverging from the topic. I never said I did not like America. I do not see how supporting the constitution and every Americans right to personal liberty translates to hating this land.

Person: If you do not want these laws in place you want the terrorists to win, therefore you must not love America. Or you are a coward who just wants to surrender to them.

Me: Say wha...?

Is it just me or does basic reasoning go out the window anytime islam or terrorists are mentioned? Sometimes I feel like im on crazy pills.

Ignus Fatuus

2007-10-09T10:51:00.000-04:00

There was in every hollow
A hundred wrymouthed wisps.
—Dafydd ap Gwilym (trans. Wirt Sikes), 1340

Yes kiddies, its that time of year again. Break out your cloaks (those of you who dont wear them year round) and dust off your wooden brooms, its time to prep for all Hallow's Eve. It is one of your eridute writer's favored past times to steep in the rich water's of holiday lore before the main event. I wanted to talk about Jack-O-Lantern's, yes again. Dont roll your eyes at me sis. After ruminating upon the topic I realized that there was a very important and related legend that we need to touch upon, that of Ignus Fatuus.

Other names you have heard Ignus Fatuus referred to as:
The Lambent Flame
Will o' Wisp
The Hobby Lantern
Jack the Lantern
Corpse Fire
Irrlicht
Foxfire
Friar Lantern

and thats just to name a few...

So what is this mega-awesome Ignus Fatuus all about? Well let me tell you. They are gaseous eminations from flatulant Scottish men. No no, not really. They are floating and drifting lights, usually found in swamps and bogs. With no apparent source of energy, they drift about as they please.

Gaelic and Slavic legend tell that they are mischevious/malevolent spirits. They are manifestations of a non-human, possibly dead intelligence. Legend also has it that they like to lead travellers to dangerous situations, or treasure if the person is brave (or foolish) enough to follow. Sometimes they even use illusion to appear in the form of luminescent mortal creature if one peers deeply enough into the light.

Another claim is that these wisps are doomed souls. Human souls who are trapped between heaven and hell, forever locked out of the world of the living. They trudge restlessly about the earth. Only able to manifest for short times at night. Why would they lead travellers astray then? Perhaps doing so might help them on their mission for final rest. Or maybe they just like fucking with people since they are screwed anyway. Whatever the motivation is, they dont seem to kill mortals. So if you encounter one, and follow it, you could end up being in a messed up situation. You will probably live though, unless you do something dumb to get yourself dead.

Now, another claim is that they are methane gas created by rotting vegitation, which does make a reasonable kind of sense. That or that they are phosphoretted hydrogen. There seems to be no documentable scientific evidence to conclude what they are. It is rare that these things occur in the modern age, nor can their effects be produced in a lab. You may want to draw your own conclusions. If you do end up following one, and live to tell the tale, do let me know.

To better arm you for any possible encounters you may have with these nasty little lights, I will list two charts below with corresponding data and reference documents for your perusal. Happy Hunting!

Note: Click on the picture to get a better view of it!

Bicyclers = HULK SMASH!

2007-10-08T10:29:00.000-04:00

Not every bicycler in the world mind you. If someone is riding on a bike trail, or a sidewalk, or even designated bicycling areas, then that's fine. When they are riding down a narrow street, that happens to always have heavy traffic then it is not ok. Especially when they travel at something like 10 mph and drivers have to swerve/brake like mad just to avoid killing them. You would think that these people might get a clue and use different streets or something.

Instead, the driver has to follow their slow ass for miles until traffic allows them to swerve into the other lane to pass them. Which is just maddening by the way, God forbid they try to be conscientious of the people in 1-2 ton vehicles who could flatten them at any minute. What is worse is when the rider is so physically wide that you cant even pass them on the off chance you might clip their backfat or something. Which would send them careening to their death.

I don't buy this "they have a right to be on the road too" malarky. They should know better.

Disturbing things...

2007-10-03T00:05:00.000-04:00

Congressional resolutions that have no binding enforcement on the war in Iraq.

The dollar dropping in value so fast that gravity has to catch up to it (and what that represents).

Pictures of Bea Arthur naked.

People who mistreat good gin.

Little bits of cartilage that sometimes ends up in ground meat.

Pictures of Bea Arthur naked.

Amerikan cinema pisses me off sometimes

2007-09-30T00:50:00.000-04:00

Everytime I see a movie talk about "Freedom" I want to wince. For some reason this term is so popular that people want to put it in movies as some generic rallying cry. They don't explain what "Freedom" actually means to the ones who proclaim how much they love it though. It's just some fucking random ass flag that is supposed to make people feel good and have the sympathize with the 'good guys'. I am so tired of hearing about "Freedom". I'd rather hear about how they want better lives, better jobs, more food for their kids... but fucking "Freedom"? I'm sorry, I just don't buy it. It's too generic, too market researched. They and their "Freedom" can kiss my ass until they explain what that means in their minds.

Oh, and another thing... what's with these assholes in medieval movies drawing swords with a 'shclliing!' noise? That means that their scabbard would have a metal rim that they draw the sword through. Dragging a sharp blade through a flat metal rim would dull a weapon to the point that any hero would die a quick death because his blade is too dull to punch through armor. Yes it is more dramatic, but c'mon, they can't think of anything better than that? Oi! Where has realism gone in cinema? I just want a little. BY ODIN'S RAVENS HUGIN AND MUNIN! GIVE ME SOME REALISM PEOPLE!

Citizenship is not only a benefit but it’s also an identity

2007-09-28T11:31:00.000-04:00

I was reading this article and I thought hey, finally they are getting something right. Well perhaps not right but definately better. Yes better is entirely subjective, and since this is my blog I can be as subjective as I fucking want to be. :)

That being said they decided to strike these questions...
Can you name one of the country’s longest rivers?
A Native American tribe?
What makes Benjamin Franklin famous?

Given that most Americans couldnt answer all of these questions, I dont see how asking these of immigrants is somehow creating ties between them and the idea of what it is to be an American.

The new exam asks why the flag has 13 stripes and what the Constitution does. I think it might have been better to also ask, "What does the Constitution mean to you?", or something along those lines. It is a start though. Being able to name a river or indian tribe means nothing if you dont understand the context of why those questions are being asked. Im glad they are finally getting that fixed. Now we just need a requirement to speak fluent english...

If you want to see how well you would do on a citizenship test that immigrants would take click here.

Yay! I got 95% right! I just missed number 8. Im ok with that, I think that was the only one I wasnt really sure of anyhow. They should have added the question: What is the most important amendment in the Constitution? The obvious answer of course, is the 21rst amendment! Which, by the way is an excellent bar in the downtown area.

An excellent watering hole

2007-08-28T02:33:00.000-04:00

This is exactly what I need...

get your mind out of the gutter sicko, I'm talking about the bar. I recently went to the city (San Francisco) and visited my sister's local bar. This place is a pit that is full of salty scum the likes that you would only find in an inner city libation nexus. It is the kind of place where you would need to consider getting a tetanus shot just from putting your arms on the bar. It is the kind of place where packs of dogs (literally) run amok through throngs of inebriated cutthroats. It is the kind of place that parents would not take their kids. Where guys with names like 'spider' or 'gentle brandon' or 'mad-dog mary' would be found slaking their unending thirst. In other words, it is a great place to be.

Cheers to superior watering holes!

Sensationalism

2007-06-28T14:40:00.000-04:00

In this modern age we have public figures who behave in extreme fashions simply for the sake of gathering attention. Ann Coulter, Al Sharpton ect.. They take these crazy ass extreme positions, simply to promote their own celebrity. To what purpose? So that they can continue their jobs as public figures? The sad part is that our society promotes and rewards this behavior. The extremist gets rewarded with ratings regardless of whether they are liked or disliked, or how many lives they destroy.

Media outlets are encouraged by this sort of thing. Yet what does this say about our society and the kind of decay we are suffering? These people should be exposed for the hatemongers they are and ostracized from the general list of acceptable public figures. Yet here they are in full ink, slandering other people with no fear of consequence. Seeking out controversy to get their names yet one more time in the news. The truly sickening thought is that we are all to blame for allowing this to continue.

Sewage on your trans-atlantic flight

2007-06-20T10:25:00.000-04:00

Sewage flows down aisles of trans-Atlantic flight...
Video...
When I first read the intro headline I was thinking how much that whole situation must have sucked. Seven hours on a plane with raw sewage flowing down the isles. Despite myself, the article had a video and I just had to see the travesty with my own eyes. Oh and before you go on, make sure you watch the video in the upper right corner of the page, dont even bother with the article.

Article and video here

Ok, you watched it I hope, because my opinion wont be quite as understandable if you didnt.

So this flowing of raw sewage was just one still image. Not a video, the video was of a stupid newscast. Ive been had! Not only that, it was this tiny trickle which was all dry. Then they show this whiny bitch who is 'offended' because he was asked not to drink too much when the bathrooms were busted. Oh... im sorry, did the whiny bitch skin his knee? They should have just thrown him off of the plan at 34,000 feet if he couldnt handle a situation that was out of their control.

Im guessing Continental didnt plan to have the sewage system break. Im also guessing that the flight attendants and pilot felt pretty bad about the situation. What has happened to people these days? Couldnt this guy just tough it out and get his fucking voucher? Maybe bitch about it to his friends later. No, instead our media seems to embrace this culture of offended wimps trend. I bet there were old ladies on the plane who toughed it out better than this loser. Eh.. it just makes me sick.

When Squirrels go bad...

2007-06-15T10:07:00.000-04:00

An aggressive squirrel attacked and injured three people in a German town before a 72-year-old pensioner dispatched the rampaging animal with his crutch.

Squirrel Article

Now how is that for copy? You hear about rampaging bulls or vice presidents on duck hunts, but not squirrels. I didnt know they were capable of going on a town rampage. What I wonder is, would people watch it if it was a reality tv epsiode?

Even nature is against our leader

2007-05-25T09:36:00.001-04:00

http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=c28_1180051991

What are you supposed to think when the beasts of the field send you this clear message about your leadership?

Sisters, cousins and proms

2007-05-05T00:13:00.000-04:00

Sisters and girl cousins, all of which are younger, are not supposed to grow up. They are supposed to stay little sisters forever. But then I hear stuff like they are going to proms with their boyfriends. THEN I recieve pictures of them where they have the temerity to look like girls!

What the frig is this? Since when are they supposed to grow up and be all... mankiller-like? I had to deal with this with one sister already, and now its a cousin AND a sister. I have this ingrained older brother trait that I need to get past I think. Basically, realizing that my younger close female siblings are no longer kids and are now young adults. That is hard to do.

I threatened to sit on the porch with a shotgun at my other sister's prom and I really would do it for my youngest. I even scared a guy when I was casually holding a hammer once and was talking about how precious my sisters were to him. Ms. Rose probly remembers that. Anyhow, as is usual, my oldest younger sis totured me with stories of my youngest sis growing up. Then, I had to hear about my cousin in the same manner. It's maddening I tell you. I'm proud of them, im happy for them, and I just have to accept the fact that they arent kids anymore. Sigh... My family rocks.

In closing...

The e-mailer

2007-05-04T17:32:00.000-04:00

Have you ever encountered one of those people, you know... the ones who like to e-mail? Now, I admit it, I use e-mail. I use e-mail when I have something to say and I dont want to use snail mail or texting. But SOME people go wayy overboard. You know what im talking about.

They send you a quick e-mail asking you some random inanity. So you answer right? Then they respond with a fucking book in your inbox. And if you dont respond to EVERY POINT in that goddamn book of an e-mail they bitch about you not being responsive on e-mail.

It makes me want to kick these people into a well and force them to have to only communicate by shouting up to the people at the top. Either that or spamming their inbox until their mail server crashes. The well sounds more fun though.

Thoughts of the day

2007-05-04T01:34:00.000-04:00

Ok kiddies gather round uncie smitty and let him tell you some important things to ponder.

Today we are going to talk about AWARDS

The Shenanigans Award

This one goes out to our very own paragon of justice in America. You got it kids, Gonzo himself! He got caught lying about the lawyers, he cant run his own department, but he can come up with ways to violate the geneva conventions. Now his own party is calling Shenanigans on him. Someone want to give Alan Specter a gun to pistol whip him with?

The Go Team Award

The National Academy of Sciences has concluded that windmills wont stop acid rain. The also might endanger some bats and birds and drastically reduce coal emissions and other environmental pollutants. Now, we havsto protect the birdies. Its ok to slash and burn the forests for coal mines. Killing countless animals with coal based pollution and habitat destruction, eh... par for the course. But dont let those birdies get whacked by a wind turbine. Might as well just scrap the whole clean energy initiative and spend 20 more years thinking of 'alternate energy solutions'. GO TEAM!

The We Love our Executive Branch Award

Yay! Do I really need to elaborate?

The Happy Townie Award

The Murphy's won the BCN awards. The Sox whooped Yankee ass. That one homeless guy isnt molesting total strangers in the common anymore. Life is good for a townie.

The... well uh...

I dont know who the fuck these guys are, what they are supposed to be dressed up as, or what the hell they are doing... what the fuck ARE they doing?

Well thank you for viewing the awards, dont say I never did nothin for ya.

Epiphenomenalism and Qualia

2007-05-04T01:19:00.000-04:00

In the neverending war for minds. You still find the dualists and the physicalists waging their jousts. Only they wage it in this field as well. I say that there is some room to count qualia among a viable theory. Though in what sense I still am at a loss to account for... yet.

I dont know why these make me laugh

2007-03-24T16:23:00.000-04:00

Yo mama so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors

I think its the mental image that makes me laugh.

Yo mama so fat she fell in love and broke it.

This is an old one but i couldnt stop snickering when i heard it the first time.

Yo mama so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals."

Yo mama so ugly just after she was born, her mother said "What a treasure!" and her father said "Yes, let's go bury it."

Heh.

The Midnight Ride

2007-03-24T01:13:00.000-04:00

A hurry of hoofs in a village street,
A shape in the moonlight, a bulk in the dark,
And beneath, from the pebbles, in passing, a spark
Struck out by a steed flying fearless and fleet;
That was all! And yet, through the gloom and the light,
The fate of a nation was riding that night;
And the spark struck out by that steed, in his flight,
Kindled the land into flame with its heat.
He has left the village and mounted the steep,
And beneath him, tranquil and broad and deep,
Is the Mystic, meeting the ocean tides;
And under the alders that skirt its edge,
Now soft on the sand, now loud on the ledge,
Is heard the tramp of his steed as he rides.

the Mystic, being the Mystic river.... It is one thing to read this poem when you are a kid. Another to spand in the very spots that are touched upon in the Poem, Paul Revere's Ride, of which the above is just an exerpt. One could close his mental eyes and look back, and see the events take place in the very spot he stands. It is a powerful spectre if a person is open to it. To imagine the cold night, the sleeping soldiers, the misting air and sleepy farmers in these very real places. It's a strange feeling, to be in the spot where legends were born. I get caught up in all the news of political games that go on in our country today, then I go to these places and feel grounded.

Somewhere in the world, a pharmacist cries...

2007-03-17T01:51:00.000-04:00

So there I was, in the L street pub. I had met up with some friends from far far away and we had finally gotten out to a local bar. The L street is the pub that all the townies went to in goodwill hunting. I figured it would be a good spot to visit for their first pub in boston, especially since it was already kind of late. So we roll out to the L street and we belly up to the bar.

Like Viking warlords we lay our proverbial axes on the bar and order a manly drink. A drink that our fathers and grandfathers demanded in the days of their virile youth. We would like two manhattan's barkeep. The bartender blinks at us in disbelief. Then asks us if we are sure. "Fuckin-A right we are sure" we reply, with bravado borne of those who have seen the darkest depths of the tankard and emerged to tell the tale. The bartender thinks for a long moment, then slides down to the other end of the bar. He beings to concoct the opus of his drink mixing career. Drawing upon his years of previous experience to provide us with a drink that has never been ordered in all of his time at the L street.

He slides the drinks over to us. The drinks have legs that would make a broadway dancer jealous. After a brief hint of the bourbon aroma we admire the presentation of the drink. An artful lemon, a marachino cherry, and sweet vermouth mixed with god's own bourbon. This was the drink we were given. The kind of drink that ballsy world leaders would have gladly bellied up to any bar for. The bartender had an anxious look in his eye as we tasted our drinks. With a respectful nod we informed him that he earned the stripes on his bartender uniform that night.

After our Manhattan's, my friend suggests that he has the perfect drink to order. A Scotch and Coke. I look at him for a clue that he is fucking with me, but he seems to truly believe this is a good drink. Being that I havent seen him in a long time, and he is a very astute pupil of libations, I order it despite my reservations. When I do so, our eridute bartender looks at me like I just asked him for a Zima. I blink for a second, look at my friend, look at the barman, look at my friend, and decide to trust my comrades judgement. BIG MISTAKE!

So there I am with a Scotch and Coke in front of me. With some gay ass straw and a goofy lime attached to the side of the glass. I go in for a taste... and it I realize a donkey's ass might taste better than this shite. When I inform my friend of his egregious error he sits there and thinks about it for a few minutes. Then he blurts out he meant whiskey. That fucking bastard.

Minister protests same-sex union ban with a halt to all weddings

2007-03-13T12:29:00.000-04:00

"An Episcopal minister will stop performing all wedding ceremonies to protest the denomination's prohibition of same-sex unions.
Article Tools

"We are called to join the fast that our homosexual brothers and sisters in Christ have had to observe all their lives," said the Rev. Robert Hirschfeld, rector of Grace Episcopal Church.

Several members of the congregation say they support Hirschfeld's move, which he announced in his Sunday sermon. Others said they were concerned that that the move might add to the polarization of an issue that has already divided Episcopals.

Erica Winter, of Northampton, said working for social justice often involves giving up something.

"I'm so proud to be a part of this," Nina Scott, a congregant from Amherst, said. "It's a step that needs to be taken."

Two priest associates at Grace Church, the Rev. Margaret Bullitt-Jonas and the Rev. Burton Whiteside, also said they won't perform marriages."

*blink* *blink-blink* *blink* *blink*

What? This is one of the most absurd things i've heard of recently. To show that they support gay marraige they are going to ban straight marraige? Or at least make a weak half-hearted attempt to. You would think these people want to encourage people to support gay unions. If they did, denying straight couples the chance to marry probably isnt the way to go. But who am I to comment on this? Obviously, "It's a step that needs to be taken.", right?

Hey, what a keen way to support peoples civil rights. You take everyone else's civil rights away! Hooray! My position is a bit over the top, sure people can just go to other reverends to get married. Can you imagine if all of them supported that sort of thing though? I think that these rev's are just being drama queens. They know that this is just symbolic gesture that has no real weight. It's too bad. Maybe they should do something... you know... meaningful, to support this cause instead.

Digging Deep

2007-03-07T18:05:00.001-05:00

Hello boys and girls!

Today we are going to talk about sacrifice. I would talk about Libby or the up and coming Plame case but I am satisfied with the progress of that so far.

When promoting the most recent troop surge Bush in his wisdom told us we would need to sacrifice and let those 20,000 soldiers go to war. Yet what are WE sacrificing.

What's does our president have to say about this topic? "I think a lot of people are in this fight. I mean, they sacrifice peace of mind when they see the terrible images of violence on TV every night."

An excellent point. In those brief moments where my tv displays the news when im flipping between reruns and soft porn, I can get watered down news of the war. Boy that really breaks up my day. Now I will admit that it bothers me when I think of my friends in danger over there. But that is not sacrifice. Sacrifice is going without meat for three years because you willingly put yourself on war rations. It is giving up all spare rubber and metal products and changing your way of life to support your nation's cause. It is not "Spending more" as our dear leader would have us do.

What pisses me off is that the perversion of terms like Patriotism and Sacrifice is an insult to those who have made real contributions to those ideals. My friends being sent to Iraq isnt us making a sacrifice. Its me blithely accepting that they could be martyred for a war our nation does not support. If sacrificing my friends is what is being asked for, I think id rather not. At least not until the cause is worth it.

Miracle or medicine?

2007-02-28T18:37:00.000-05:00

Baby is clinically dead for 30 minutes, then comes alive

You can find the article relating to it here: Dead baby article

The idea of a miracle is that some agent of God's (or God himself) comes in and contravenes natural law. Thus making the event special enough to be called a miracle. At least that was Hume's definition of it, and most philosophers would try to force you to use this assessment.

A baby was dead for 30 minutes, and then came alive. Hume himself said such a thing was impossible. A person coming back to life would defy the laws of nature as we know them. Yet, with the advance of technology, we now know that there is clinical death, and biological death.

What other forms of death will we discover and defy in the future?

Will we have to redefine our concepts of the laws of nature as time progresses? Is that definition of a miracle appropriate given our mindset and society we live in? Ideas like "little miracles" are pervasive throughout theist society. Could God interceding through natural laws be construed as a miracle? I just felt like putting my thoughts down for a moment. I will leave drawing conclusions to a later post perhaps.

Yes I poached this joke, but its funny

2007-02-28T00:07:00.000-05:00

In light of recently being bombarded with news of that ridiculous circus (that involves human vultures fighting) over Anna Nichole Smith's corpse, I think the following joke is overdue...

Q: What's the definition of necrophilia?
A: The urge to crack open a cold one.

Off colour, not mine, but I laughed.

Movie Review: Lady in the Water

2007-02-26T23:07:00.000-05:00

I know it has been a while since I have reviewed anything. So I said to myself "we must review it precious, we must!"

The Good

So much to choose from. I suppose I will start with Paul Giamatti.

Dude kicks ass in this movie. He plays a man who has hit bottom. Even so, his character is still helping others. I cant think of a lot of actors who can look so... normal. He did an excellent job at seeming like a caring, messed up (emotionally) guy. He found greatness at the end, but only by letting go of everything he had been holding in.

Even though this is a children's story, it resonates on many different levels. It...

touches on the theme that ordinary people can achieve extraordinary things

displays that regardless of one's personal rut, a reawakening can turn things around

treads upon the theme of belief

illustrates the idea of letting go to become whole

alludes strongly that everyone is connected

shows that annoying movie critic get his ass chewed off

All good things. :)

Next we have Bryce Dallas Howard. Im not really down with the name. But she did an excellent job portraying her character in this quirky nymph out of water story. Get that double meaning? I amuse myself.
Just get an eyeful of that girl. In the words of Bob Barker, "I don't want a piece, I want the whole thing!".

Despite the pacing, the characters are interesting enough that I enjoyed following them through the movie. Like the movie critic guy, what an effete bastard. I love it.

Or the guy who only works out one side of his body. Who thinks up this stuff? After I stopped laughing I totally dug it.

I also love the fact that this movie is deeply rooted in reality. The fact that the Scrunt couldnt be seen unless it wanted to. Or by those chosen to see it, helped reinforce that this was a real world fairy tale. The old lady and her daughter were hilarious too.

The Bad

The pacing was a wee bit slow, but like i said, the characters and the story were good enough that this didnt kill the movie. It was mixed up enough to keep me quite interested.

This kid comes off as a smartass little puke and that pisses me off. I did not believe him in this role. In fact I havent seen him play any role that I liked. Jeffrey Wright (the guy who played his dad) on the other hand, was fricken awesome. I think it was a disservice to pair him with this kid. I didnt feel the empathy between father and son.

The monkeys at the end.. why didnt they kill the buff guy? Continuity error or am I missing something?

I'll leave the part of about M. Night casting himself as the visionary that has a revolutionary message for the world alone. The media already beat him to death over it far more eloquently than I could.

I dont want to ruin the plot, you should watch this movie. GO WATCH IT NOW! So I will go right to...

The Rating
This movie gets a solid 9 out of 10. For those of you who dont like it, I think you just didnt get it. There are so many different thematic threads in this movie that you could watch it multiple times and not catch all of them. It was well acted, excellently directed. Dogs with grassy fur, chicks who dont wear pants, badass monkeys, giant eagles, spiritual rejuvination, pool parties, what's not to like? Well done M. Night Shyamalan!

Living

2007-02-26T00:43:00.000-05:00

I suppose there is being, and living. I think most think of being as living, so i will use that word. I just heard something that really gave me a minor shakabuku moment. We, on average, or if we are lucky, get 75 years in life. 75 winters, 75 summers, which doesnt seem like that long when one thinks about it.

Now, this leads me to think... well shit, i got to get out and do stuff cause i dont want to waste that time. But then, I dont think it means i should listlessly muck about wasting energy. I think living is doing that which you enjoy, or trying to pursue your dreams. If not instantly then at least earnestly. I think if one does that, then I think their time is not wasted.

Little infuriating decisions

2007-02-25T14:17:00.000-05:00

You people... who make the following decisions. I want to pimp slap your lips off!

You who...

* Decided that you would package hotdogs and hotdog buns in different numbers.
Yes, it forces me to either waste hotdogs or buns. Or continuing buying new ones until i can mathmatically even them out.

* Thought it would be a good idea to NOT put the usb converter cable in the printer box.
So that not only do i have to buy the printer, but i have to go out and get the fucking cable too. Or buy it from you at an overinflated rate. Bastards.

* Sell battery operated products and then dont include the batteries.
How hard is it to create a synegistic partnership with a battery company and increase both of your profit margins? You would think if you are going to make a product you would assist the user in the initial means of utilizing it. But no. You lazy fucks. You could say it is lazy of me not to just go out and buy batteries. I assert that I shouldnt have to! It would be like buying a dead cell phone and not having a charger. What kind of product is that? When you buy a car they dont sell it to you without a god damn battery. Its like buying a caravan thats got no fucken wheels.

Pricks.

/rant off

Tenets from the Rule of St. Benedict

2007-02-23T00:08:00.000-05:00

* Everyone needs to perform some manual labor
* All things in moderation
* Spiritual life should be reflected upon daily, it is a daily process/struggle
* Accept others, do not change them
* Community exposes us to internal and external improvement
* All created things are god-given
* Treat things with care

Its funny how many of these could and do cross over into secular life. Even as we strive to escape some of them, like community, we still gravitate towards them. Only, they are found in a different fashion. Whether online communities, or friends at a local pub, or academic circles. Community, Umma, Relational associations, whatever you want to call them still live strongly today. Strangely though, they say individuals feel much more sequestered from the world in mordernized nations than they did a century ago. For a guy who lived 1500 years ago, St. Benedict had some good ideas.

Even with manual labor, there is a different sense of accomplishment. One could almost say a wholesome (for lack of a better word) feeling comes from it. As well as strengthening the body as a whole. Sure you get sweaty, dirty and tired, but there is more one achieves from the process than the whole of its negative aspects.

Richard Dawkins is a boob

2007-02-16T20:31:00.000-05:00

Of course, so are many of those he detracts from. It is really entertaining to watch them battle it out. I am also forced to concede that the fact that he is out there and has a reputation, and has enemies to joust with is respectable in and of itself. I shall say i dont revere the actor, i dont revere the act, but i respect the action. It is hard not to nod ones head to conviction.

Where are the great philosophers?

2006-09-21T16:28:00.000-04:00

I suppose that you have to be dead in order to be recognized by the world as a great philosopher. I was just musing over the Pope's latest speech which has 'riled up the muslim street'. A thought occurred to me, if Ibn Rashd were alive today he would have risen up and challenged the Vicar to a lively debate. The world would have groaned under the spidery threads of their theological discourse. Great scholars would debate their words for weeks to come.

The masses would sit by, scratching their heads until someone gave them a thirty second soundbite of what these guys were discussing. It would be lively and interesting. Also, the streets of Kabul wouldnt look like Oakland after the raiders just lost a game. I am willing to wager that there are modern day Ibn Rashd's out there. Only they dont have a voice loud enough to reach the western world. Instead we have guys like Muqtada al-Sadr (who take advantage of the disenfranchised and desperate) who the get all the press. The world can do better than this.

Im a moderate really!

2006-09-21T15:38:00.000-04:00

I was just looking back through my last few posts and I sound like some blubbery peta (or something similar) zealot. In truth Id say I am a well adjusted moderate. I simply have a healthy disliking towards our current executive branch. With good reason I think.

Recipe for making terrorists

2006-09-20T09:07:00.000-04:00

Note: I pulled this from a website, but I thought it was interesting enough that id post it.

1) Detain 12000 Middle Eastern men

2) Separate from wife, kids, family, and put them into prisons half way around the world

3) Don't tell them why they're there, or tell their family where they are

4) Occasionally pile them into naked pyramids with other detainees, have dogs snap at them, and ugly G. I. broad with cigarette pose next to pile

5) Let stew and simmer for upwards of 3 years, occasionally whipping into a lather

6) Voila! Terrorist is now complete-release back into the environmment from which they came, only it no longer exists-their family is either dead or gone, their house is bombed-out, their job doesn't exist any more, and they're a little miffed about some of this. NOW they really Are a terrorist, hell bent on extracting a little revenge. George, if you can't find terrorists, you might as well make them.

Movie Review: The Illusionist

2006-09-18T14:23:00.000-04:00

This is your standard love story. Soooo common in fact that you probly have seen this happen with some of your friends. It goes something like this. Boy meets girl. Boy and girl fall in love. Girl is a Duchess and her family doesnt want her associating with her peasant dog swine boyfriend. Boy is threatened with death if he sees girl again. Boy leaves and travels the world for 15 years, becomeing a master illusionist along the way. Boy returns to find his beloved betrothed to a prince who just happens to be an easy to hate rich prick. Boy gets prince killed and wins the girl. Talk about a Grimm's fairy tale ending huh? Oh, and his name is Eisenheim.

EISENHEIM! aka Ironhome
I am still not sure why they chose that name, but I'll find out. Kinda badass sounding no?

The Good

Edward Norton: Need I elaborate?

Jessica Biel: Obviously this isnt in order of best of the good things first, but still, she wasnt bad. I actually believed she was a real actress when I saw her in this movie. Usually you see her in movies like, "Return to the Black Latrine". But no, real move, real actors, and she was in it. She wasnt bad either.

Paul Giamatti: To come off of a stunning piece like Lady in the Water to this was just a great choice in job selection. After said Lady film, this perspicacious reviewer expected nothing less than a top notch performance. You will be happy to note, your erudite reviewer was not disappointed.

Rufus Sewell: Always the bridesmaid, never the bride. Hmm.... I mean always the badguy never the hero. But damnit he is a great bad guy! Its so easy to think of him as such a big asshole. He does a pretty good job of it in this movie too. I watched the making of some movie he was in once and they said this guy throws huge orgies or something. Go fig.

Aside from the actors, who were just a great cast, this movie was set in the Victorian period. How cool is that? I know what you are thinking, didnt they wear goofy military uniforms back then? Well yes they did, but we must look past that. The illusions were also most excellent.

The Bad

There were some things which upon cursory reflection look like continuity isssues.

Who was the disappearing old dude? Was he just a tie in to get the kid interested in magic?

How did the sword trick work? When did he have time to get the jewel?

If she was wounded on the left side of her neck, why was the right side of her horse bloody?

Also, what was with Sewel's mustache? He looked like he had a muskrat tail attached to his nose.

The movie isnt full of action, its slower, but still interesting. If you adore movies like XXX you might not get this movie.

The Rating:
I give it an 8. A very strong, well acted, beautifully put together flick.

23rd Qualm

2006-09-18T14:21:00.000-04:00

George Bush is my shepherd; I dwell in want.
He maketh logs to be cut in national forests.
He leadeth trucks into the still wilderness.
He restoreth my fears.
He leadeth me in the paths of international disgrace for his ego's sake.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of pollution and war,
I will find no exit, for thou art in office.
Thy tax cuts for the rich and thy media control, they discomfort me.
Thou preparest an agenda of deception in the presence of thy religion.
Thou anointest my head with foreign oil.
My health insurance runneth out.
Surely megalomania and false patriotism shall follow you for last days of
Thy term,
And my jobless child shall dwell in my basement forever

Bush on leaks

2006-06-27T09:17:00.000-04:00

Once again, our clever administration is haranguing the New York times over "leaking secret information". This time it is in relation to using banking systems to track and freeze funds to terrorist organizations. Was 'following the money' with terrorists really a surprise to anyone? Is anyone shocked that the goverment has a program set up to do this? Will the program suddently fall apart now that the public 'is aware' of it? Please.

This is nothing but a cheap PR stunt.

I say again...

ALL YOUR SECRET ARE BELONG TO US!

This is simply a tactic of bullying the press. On the flipside, this story really isnt a big eye opener. I would rate this headline to be equally as scintillating, "Department of Homeland security engaged in program to defend the country." Woah, hold the phone, what a shocker. Really? Bottom line, the NYT knows how to get circulation, our fearless leaders beat on them so that the press wont report on MORE of their criminal behavior. When Bush leaks information on our CIA agents its a matter of declassifying information. When they NYT leaks information that might negatively affect his limited popularity it is a matter of national security. Same story, different day. Rinse and repeat.

What I wouldnt give for some real leadership in this country...

Have some class with your alcohol

2006-06-21T16:17:00.000-04:00

Gather ye children of Bacchus, quoth I wisdom from the sacred text of the fumy spirit....

A shot without a toast is like sex without foreplay.

And by a toast I don’t mean “Cheers” or “Here’s to you” — offering those is akin to christening a battleship with a Dixie cup. No, you want something melodic, meaningful and memorable, something capable of inspiring the troops before they happily careen into battle.

Our enemies never drink
Our friends always do
So let’s drink this drink
And tell between the two.

- Tis good to know who your friends are

Here’s to the man who takes the pledge
Who keeps his word and does not hedge
Who won’t give up and won’t give in
Till the last man’s out and there’s no more gin.

- Truly inspirational, now go have another drink

Better a well known drunkard
Than an anonymous alcoholic.

- Might as well go out in style

Work like you don’t need the money
Love like you’ve never been hurt
Dance like no-one is watching
Screw like it’s being filmed
And drink like a true Irishman.

- The last couple of lines say it all

Let us have wine and women
Mirth and laughter
Sermons and soda-water
The day after.

- Spoken like a good Catholic boy

Steady your glasses
Here comes the gale
Batten down the hatches
And lean well over the rail.

- In tribute to my buddy overseas

Here’s to whiskey, scotch and rye
Amber, smooth, and clear
Not as sweet as a woman’s lips
But a damn sight more sincere.

- Zipping the lip on this one

Here’s to a long life and a merry one
A quick death and an easy one
A pretty girl and an honest one
A cold drink—and another one.

- Cheers to that

No matter how beautiful
Smart and full of class
To somebody, somewhere
She’s a major pain in the ass.

- For some reason this makes me laugh a lot

Here’s to those who wish us well
As for the rest, they can go to Hell.

- A gentleman's toast obviously

While we live
Let’s live.

- After 15 shots, this toast still can make sense

Wise, kind, gentle, generous, sexy
But enough about me, here’s to you.

- Now theres a toast your friends can drink to

Drink today and drown all sorrow
You shall perhaps not do it tomorrow
Best while you have it, use your breath
There is no drinking after death.

- A true poet's toast

Why myspace is totally balls...

2006-06-21T14:46:00.000-04:00

Ok, so you want to make an new blog. Yay, good for you. So what do you do? Well if you are like the 50 million other lemmings out there you create a myspace page. Why? Because everyone else is doing it, and we all know, the best place to put all of your dirty little secrets is online where every whackjob in the world can read it.

The place is basically a dramaqueen central. Anyone and everyone who ever wanted attention can get it. If that's what you are looking for then great. Mission accomplished. If you want an actual blog service though, the site is balls.

Things I despise about myspace in general...

The site is clunky as hell. It takes forever to load pages.

People have no clue how to build a friendly webpage, and all of those people flock to myspace like hyena's to a rotting carcass.

Everyone has to have their damn song playing on their page so that it automatically loads when you open their profile. Which just bogs things down even more. It's even better when they have terrible taste in music so that your ears are bleeding by the time you finally turn the screeching off.

The actual programming for the blog threading sucks.

But hey, thats not why its users are there in the first place right? So be free, walk in your self imposed darkness my friends. While you are bumbling around looking for a clue I will enjoy a decent online service instead.

Ode to Snowstorms

2006-02-13T10:47:00.000-05:00

Calm becomes flurries.
Boots crunch above earth's surface.
Tiny white stars fall.

Movie Review: The Punisher

2006-01-04T09:45:00.000-05:00

The New One (Mostly)

This is a movie based on the classic Punisher comic book. A respectable piece of fiction in and of itself. While no movie can really do the comic justice, I think this movie did a fairly good job of depecting ole Frank Castle. Break out the popcorn kids, this might be a long one.

The Good

Let's start with Frank himself.

Before I go on to this movie I must honor the previous Punisher movie and Dolf Lungren, who was the first Frank Castle.

Look at this crazy mofo. Would you want to run into him in a dark alley? Hell no. We who are about to Dolf salute you!

The new movie's Frank Castle is Thomas Jane. He is the more human of the two Punishers. Dolf has the personality of an alien cyborg compared to Jane.

Thomas Jane gives the Punisher a more human face.

Jane kicks ass in this movie.

Rebecca-Romijn Stamos, what a hottie. I mean, her acting was great in this movie.

To your left.... The Russian, just look at that monster.

This car makes me weep with joy.

John Travolta was also good in this movie, but he is always decent. He was almost too good for this film though.

The Bad

The plot. Very basic, very straightforward. I would say that is unusual, but its not. The Punisher is a straightforward guy, you are bad, he kills you. It makes for fun comics and ok flow for movies.

Continuity issues, they had this with the first one too. It is what happens in Punisher flicks. Like the part where the Russian fucks Castle up and he drinks half a bottle of Wild Turkey in one gulp. Then the Jolly Blonde Giant stitches his ass up. There is no way he would come out of that elevator all sober and mentally aware like he was. They made an effort to have this movie more grounded in reality and then went and did that scene. That pisses me off.

It is another origin movie. The did it in the first movie version, and they did it here too. They basically did the "why the punisher is the punisher" story. Thats cool and all, but hey I have an idea. That wheel has already been invented, lets not reinvent it over and over. Why not just have a movie of the punisher whooping some more ass and taking more names next time?

No Louis Gossett Jr., that's who the Punishers partner should have been. Of the two movies he was the best partner/supporting actor.

The Rating

I would give this movie an 7-8/10. Jane made a great Punisher, and he was human. Which was Marvel's big thing with the ole vigilante. The plot was lame, but the actors ruled. The fights were well done. It also had Rebecca Romijn in it. I think it stayed pretty true to Punisher cannon, so yes, it has my highly sought after stamp of approval.

Happy New Year... or something like that

2006-01-01T03:47:00.000-05:00

I am the harbinger of luck.

Thats right. I said it, I am the harbinger of luck.

Did you know....

0 It was considered lucky to eat food that was circular in shape on new years, as it represented the completion of a full circle.
0 It was considered particularly lucky to have the first visitor you see in the new year be a tall, dark haired man. No bullshit.
0 Rice and cabbage are considered lucky foods to eat on new years day/night.
0 Jan 1 is just an arbitrary day, the real new year occurs on the first new moon after the vernal equinox.

That being said, let me share with you dear reader, my new year eve. This year of course, actually... no less than four hours ago. Here I sit, in the darkened chamber of my room with naught but a lit candle and a half full bottle of wine. The snow is falling lightly if relentlessly outside. By lamplight it provides sufficient illumination to see as if it were twilight. Given this atmosphere and the onset of some inebriation... I think I'll actually write one post here with some unique if non-specific substance about me.

That being said, it was a fairly decent new year eve. I hardly drank at all, visited three parties, and felt at home in none. They were all full of friendly people, all had plenty of drink and things to eat. However, I realized what was lacking was someone to share it with. I suppose being around people on the new year is better than being alone, but a step up from that would be being around someone or someones you can share a night of revelry with. Being a fairly recent arrival here I have found that making friends is a more difficult prospect that I anticipated. I know many, but have few friends. I suppose it just takes time. Though with a few good friends you wouldnt need parties, the party would be where you are.

The eve also makes me re-evaluate the nature of my relations with people and how I conduct myself. I suppose such things are natural. I think I need to rededicate myself to not persue happiness. Many great writers have asserted that when one is consumed with action one can find happiness. But when one is searching or even dare I say the ugly word, grasping.. for it, one finds it not. I think I shall focus this year on deepening ties with people I know and perfecting what it is that I do. I know, not great revelations in themselves, and certainly not original ideas. They are significant for me nonetheless.

With that dear reader, I will leave you with this. I wish you a most productive and happy year. I wish upon you fortune and good fruits borne by your labour. May this year be better than your last one.

Movie Review: Narnia- The Lion, the witch and the wardrobe

2005-12-21T09:44:00.000-05:00

Where do I begin?

This movie was overall quite entertaining. Not too long, not too short. The scenery and costumes were amazing. The beastfolk cgi and actor integration was well done. I like how they didnt try to go over the top with it like in some movies. The movie seem to follow the book fairly well, though there were a couple of small differences that I did not mind overlooking at all.

The Good -

Skandar Keynes was a great choice for Edmund. He was such a little pissah in the movie. At the same time you could kind of see why he did what he did. So he was more of a real character and not just hatable.

Mr. Tumnus, I have never been more impressed with James McAvoy's work. Bravo!

The white witch, she was an evil bitch. What a great job, i dont know about the whole dreadlocks look but she was evil enough not to make this movie a yawner.

The way they portrayed Narnia when it was under winter was pretty boss. It was a dark and uneasy place to be. The mood in the first half of the movie was excellently done.

The Bad-

They say Narnia is a big place... then the kids travel across the breadth of it in a day. Whats with that?

Some would say the biblical references were glaringly obvious here. But I say, hello, its a friggen CS Lewis book, what do you expect? Thats like going to a monster truck rally and bitching about why you are only looking at big trucks.

This one drove me crazy. The boys learning to be consummate combatants in just a few days? At least they tried to show that the boys were training to fight. Though the director did a piss poor job of it. I saw Peter taking those wild swings against the witch in that battle, while she was fighting florentine style. She had like five chances to kill him and I just couldnt help twitching every time she didnt skewer him like a shishkabob. They really should have taught that kid to swordfight a little. It just hurt to watch that, and I usually dig battle scenes.

I think they made the weather change too quickly. It made the movie feel rushed and less believable.

The Rating-
Overall id give it a 7/8 out of 10. The movie was a little lighthearted for me towards the end, I think it could have been just a little more sinister. It would have made the kids ultimate triumph that much more compelling. As is, Id recommend people fork out the money to see it in theatres. It is worth watching at least once. I'll probly get it when it comes out on video.

Happy tidings for the holidays in Washington

2005-12-21T09:36:00.000-05:00

So the last couple of days when I have cracked open the news I have seen naught but good things. The Senate has shot down the patriot act. Even though Bush tried to force them to sign it as is. They even offered to compromise on it and he refused thinking they would cave just because the house gave it a thumbs up. Go Senate, let that piece of hogwash expire.

We have the information about how DeLay lived like a king off of campaign contributions. This only further destroys his posturing of not abusing funds. The courts even denied him a faster trial and decided to try him on the courts timetable. Go justice system for not caving to the man!

Moving on, Bush is now under fire for extending wiretaps without warrants on American citizens. Being that he could not hide the fact that he did it he came out and admitted it. When I read bi-partisan comments of how its a breach of the law and the will of congress I laughed. I couldnt help it. Its about time our officials are held accountable for their actions. It hasnt happened yet, but this is a good step in that direction.

All in all Id rate the score:

People - 1
Bush Team - 0

Movie Review: Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire

2005-12-06T16:05:00.000-05:00

I walked into the theatre hoping for "the Prisoner of Azkaban" good. What I witnessed was something even better. Well directed , more bittersweet, and definately darker.

The Good-
No longer do we need to go over character backgrounds. Potter and the others are so established at this point that we can get right into the action.

The dudes from Bulgaria? were pretty fricken cool. They made the Hogwart's kids look kind of prissy.

Voldemort (or however you spell it) was AWESOME. He was so evil, cruel and just creepy. I cant wait to see what kind of fucked up stuff he does in the next movie. Finally, a villain worth watching.

The dance, wonderful way to bring the craziness of a magical world down by tossing in some human failings. Once again we realize that powerful though they be, they are still kids growing up.

The Bad-
They pushed the fantastic to a higher level. One of the few things I liked about the first movie is that I could see the ties into reality and the normal mundane world. In this movie you can almost forget that there is a regular world out there. Much less grounded than the other movies, but still just within reasonable levels.

The characters from the other schools were a little underdeveloped. Also, what was with the girl champion being so lame? That just bothered me. I didnt mind the 50's femininity theme, but did their heroin have to suck so bad?

What is the deal with Ron's hissyfit about Harry being in the contest. I thought that was just lame writing on JK's part. I get that she wanted to toss some teenage jealousy in, but she blew it on that one.

The Rating-
I would rate this movie an 8 out of 10. I would definately pay to see it again or watch it at home a few times if I owned the dvd. Very well done and even better than the first three. I can not wait to see what the next movie has to offer. This concludes my movie review for the day. If you disagree with me its ok, just remember, you are wrong. :)

On Snow...

2005-12-05T10:22:00.000-05:00

I like snow. Snow is good. Good in my belly... wait, wrong commentary.

Snow is lovely though. Im new to the whole phenom., but it seems to me that once it creates a white blanket on the waking word, time seems to slow down. It is as if there is a lesser sense of urgency than exists in those hot muggy summer months in this region. It could be because my blood is cooler in the snow, but I dont think that is correct hypothesis. Everything appears more prestine than it was. A purified picturesque landscape everywhere you look. How can one not appreciate it?

US, the good and bad

2005-12-04T20:24:00.000-05:00

"Watching the pathetic, old, lie-on-its-back frightened Labrador of the American media changing overnight into a vicious Rottweiler is one of the enduring pleasures of society in the United States."

This was a quote from Robert Fisk, written no more than a day ago. A talented UK reporter to be sure, but one I usually dont agree with. Like most EU pressmen he seems obsessed with jumping on the anti-US bandwagon. On this particular occasion though, I do quite agree with him. It is a pleasure to see our toothless media grow some balls and start asking the hard questions. The questions even I dont want to know the answers to. Not because I dont want to see justice done, but because I dont want to believe that our government could be responsible for such reckless misbehavior.

A thing that many forget, is that the American way works. We are a fucked up nation at times, this is true. But it is our own conscience that wakes us up from our darkest dreams and brings about a new catharsis. The civil rights era, the abolition movement, the Resolution of Apology to Native Peoples introduced in U.S. Congress May 6, 2004, the McCarthy era, and now..

We are not a perfect nation, by any means. But it is a comforting thought to know that we have the power to correct ourselves. Even facing the dark truths that we as a nation are ashamed/afraid of facing. I take comfort in the thought that the vast majority of Americans want to do the right thing, both domestically and abroad. It is inevitable that there are those who will try to lead us astray, but just knowing that such ill winds will not be the will of this country is enough to let me rest easier.

As the most influential nation on this earth our actions will resonate louder than any other. Our mistakes will be known by all, our failings will be trumpeted everywhere. Especially by those who envy our virtues and successes. But in history, if we stay true to ourselves, the character of our nation will not be mistaken. My fervent hope is that we stay true to the ideals we have always held dear, even in the centuries ahead. If we do, I do not fear for America's fate. I simply remain a proud citizen.

You know you are a drinker when...

2005-12-04T01:39:00.000-05:00

If a party runs out of booze, you sock the host and drink his nosebleed.

You know how to say “Where are my pants?” in seven languages.

You have a lot of respect for that 80-year-old guy at the end of the bar, but you know from experience that he’s a dirty fighter.

You got in a fist fight with a wino over how long a bottle of Thunderbird should be allowed to “breathe”.

When you donate blood they store it in oak barrels.

Anyone who kisses you must legally wait half an hour to drive.

You enjoy cooking with wine, and sometimes you even put it in the food.

You’ve been cut off during communion.

From another perspective

2005-11-26T02:30:00.000-05:00

Can you imagine being a housecat (or some other small house domesticated creature) living among giants? Being in a place where these strange creatures who are infinately larger, stronger and faster can dictate the very conditions you live under? With a moment of action they can shut portals (doors) that cannot be passed through no matter how you try. With little more effort they can create light or make it dark at a whim. It is a good thing your senses are keener than theirs, or you would really suffer at these giants capricious fancies.

On our Constitution : Warning-Long Post

2005-11-15T13:52:00.000-05:00

Mr. President,

I confess that there are several parts of this constitution which I do not at present approve, but I am not sure I shall never approve them: For having lived long, I have experienced many instances of being obliged by better information, or fuller consideration, to change opinions even on important subjects, which I once thought right, but found to be otherwise. It is therefore that the older I grow, the more apt I am to doubt my own judgment, and to pay more respect to the judgment of others.

Most men indeed as well as most sects in Religion, think themselves in possession of all truth, and that wherever others differ from them it is so far error. Steele a Protestant in a Dedication tells the Pope, that the only difference between our Churches in their opinions of the certainty of their doctrines is, the Church of Rome is infallible and the Church of England is never in the wrong. But though many private persons think almost as highly of their own infallibility as of that of their sect, few express it so naturally as a certain french lady, who in dispute with her sister, said "I don't know how it happens, Sister but I meet with no body but myself, that’s always in the right--il n'y a que moi qui a toujours raison."

In these sentiments, Sir, I agree to this Constitution with all its faults, if they are such; because I think a general Government necessary for us, and there is no form of Government but what may be a blessing to the people if well administered, and believe farther that this is likely to be well administered for a course of years, and can only end in Despotism, as other forms have done before it, when the people become so corrupted as to need despotic Government, being incapable of any other.

I doubt too whether any other Convention we can obtain, may be able to make a better Constitution. For when you assemble a number of men to have the advantage of their joint wisdom, you inevitably assemble with those men, all their prejudices, their passions, their errors of opinion, their local interests, and their selfish views. From such an assembly can a perfect production be expected? It therefore astonishes me, Sir, to find this system approaching so near to perfection as it does; and I think it will astonish our enemies, who are waiting with confidence to hear that our councils are confounded like those of the Builders of Babel; and that our States are on the point of separation, only to meet hereafter for the purpose of cutting one another's throats.

Thus I consent Sir, to this Constitution because I expect no better, and because I am not sure, that it is not the best. The opinions I have had of its errors, I sacrifice to the public good. I have never whispered a syllable of them abroad. Within these walls they were born and here they shall die. If every one of us in returning to our constituents were to report the objections he has had to it, and endeavor to gain partizans in support of them, we might prevent its being generally received, and thereby lose all the salutary effects & great advantages resulting naturally in our favor among foreign Nations as well as among ourselves, from our real or apparent unanimity.

Much of the strength & efficiency of any Government in procuring and securing happiness to the people, depends, on opinion, on the general opinion of the goodness of the Government, as well as the wisdom and integrity of its Governors. I hope therefore that for our own sakes as a part of the people, and for the sake of posterity, we shall act heartily and unanimously in recommending this Constitution (if approved by Congress & confirmed by the Conventions) wherever our influence may extend, and turn our future thoughts & endeavors to the means of having it well administered.

On the whole, Sir, I can not help expressing a wish that every member of the Convention who may still have objections to it, would with me, on this occasion doubt a little of his own infallibility, and to make manifest our unanimity, put his name to this instrument-

Written by Benjamin Franklin
Monday Sep. 17, 1787: In Convention

What I find eminently curious about this particular speech, is that its revelvance resonates strongly today. The thing we venerate as an inviolate document was indeed seen as flawed by many of our country's founders. Despite these differences of opinion the convention signed into being the document which became the binding cornerstone of our nation. It cannot be doubted, that this setting aside of personal and local ambitions for the greater public good, is what made this nation a real entity, and not just a dream.

The themes he touches upon that get in the way of positive policy making exist today. Partisan pandering, allusions to self infallibility, corruption and the happienss of the people resting on their opinion of the governments honesty (which are decidedly lacking these days) and integrity. All things, that in our hubris over the centuries we have fallen victim to. One only has to watch the news to see it. I'm willing to bet that like many, our leaders get caught up in the game sometimes, and forget some of the most important things. Like working towards the people's greater good, and not fighting wars for thier parties. Speeches like this bring it all back to focus. Perhaps they should read something like this before conducting business in the morning.

Moments only

2005-11-11T10:30:00.000-05:00

We honor the man who recklessly enters the unknowable abyss. Who for but a moment becomes a whirlwind of action. Casting off all caution and doubt he becomes iconic, enviable. From a simple, flawed member of humanity to an adonis. A storm of such intensity that he scars our psyche for years to come. Even after time has passed he is still remembered for that moment, long ago, despite his current disposition. They say that is glory, and that it stays with a man.

Intelligent Design in Kansas

2005-11-11T09:31:00.000-05:00

Let me preface this by saying that if anyone honestly supports the concept Intelligent Design (in a science class) they likely do not understand concept of "Science". What pisses me off about the whole Intelligent Design crowd is that they try to foist this invidious drivel off as science. They remind me of big tabacco corporations which tout that smoking can be good for you. Dont hate the playa, hate the game baby. Fuck you ID pusher man, I rule you with my vitriolic denial. Intelligent Design has about as much of a chance of bearing scientific value as my left testicle has of winning the nobel peace prize.

In fact, the proponents of this theory spend more time trying to justify why its not creationism in thier writing than they do laying evidence to their claims.

Moving on...

ID is the hypothesis that some things in nature are simply too complex to have evolved by natural selection, and therefore must have been “intelligently” designed.

In Behe’s testimony he cites the miniature molecular motors, called flagella, that allow bacteria to swim as an example of this. The development of flagella and the blood-clotting mechanism, which requires at least 30 different proteins to work together, are “irreducibly complex”, he argued.

Oh really? Thats your theory? Look thats complex! Some great designer must have created it. Look thats not complex, that thing obviously has no designer. Look there's an alien, lets have sex with it. Who determines what is complex or not? Some choleric nut with a penchant for eyeballing bacteria? Thats the great revelation of our time? Im floored by the such significant coruscation.

My ultimate point here is that this is not science. You want to teach that to your kids, more power to you. I have no problems at all with people believing there is a god. But make no bones about it, this ID is not science. Its philosophy at best. Dogmatic tripe in the guise of academia at worst. It has religious overtones. It's creators are all associated with religious institutions and/or previous creationist organizations. We wont be fooled by these scurillious rapscallions. Well, Kansas might, but you know, its Kansas. They change their educational curriculum like Pam Anderson goes through panties. Nuff said.

Now thats just cool!

2005-11-08T16:12:00.000-05:00

The Personnel Halting and Stimulation Response (PHASR) rifle was developed at the Air Force Research Laboratory in New Mexico, US, and two prototypes have been delivered to military bases in Texas and Virginia for further testing.

Now how cool is that? We have phasr's! Aint science fun kids?

New Body Measurement Offers Better Test for Obesity Health Risks

2005-11-04T15:29:00.000-05:00

The best test for obesity -- at least, when it comes to predicting heart attacks -- isn’t BMI (body mass index), the researchers write.

Instead, it’s the ratio of the measurement of your waist to your hips. It boils down to wider hips and slimmer waists. Larger waists were bad news; larger hips were a plus...

Abdominal fat, represented by a wider waistline, has been linked to heart risks. Wider hips may mean bulkier bones and stronger gluteal muscles, write the researchers.

I can live with that. I like the fact that what I find pleasing to the eye is also the way things should be. It didnt show the actual suggested ratio for men and women, but it sounds pretty reasonable. Though I think for the most part this is basically common sense.

The Two Primary Laws of Drinking

2005-11-03T18:20:00.000-05:00

Heed my words ye drunkards, bow your head's in veneration. I present to you your sacred covenant.

1. The Law of the Open Bottle-
Thou shalt share thy booze if thou have it and thy friends do not. Let them sup the nectar of Bachhus's goodness.

2. The Law of Round Reciprocity-
(Also known as the Buy Back Law)
Thou shalt buy a drink for thy friend upon thy next opportunity, if he hast purchased thee one recently. Thou must close the circle of the drink purchase so that it may beginneth again.

These are not the droids you are looking for!

2005-11-03T16:11:00.000-05:00

Sometimes the amount of denial I witness is astounding. I have just read not once, not twice, but thrice! Seperate comments by everyday Amurcan Joes who claim that:

A- Our administration performed no dishonest behavior in the lead up to the war in Iraq. That there was no misrepresentation to the public and that the Plame issue is completely groundless.

B- Rove and Libby are innocent upstanding patriots who would not harm a fly.

C- That his approval ratings are a lie, they are really much higher.

D- That his detractors are just making all this shit up to bring down a good hardworkin man.

E- Our economy is better than ever.

and let me not forget...

F- Bush and Cheney do not support torture, anywhere at any time.

Now, you would think that with all the evidence out there, which has taken years to amass by the way, that any reasonable person could accept the fact that maybe our Executive Branch has been a bit shady the last few years. Thats not to say that Bush and co are responsible for all the worlds problems. HOWEVER, people seem to forget it was Bush who said, "I will bring integrity back to the white house". What's that? You ask who has been indibted lately? Why that would be ole "Scooter", Vice President Cheney's top confidant and Bush policy maker. Who is also caught up in criminal conspiracy? Karl "The Saint" Rove? Get outta here.

Seriously though, to all you crazy Bush cheerleaders I say go read the papers. Read papers with conflicting agenda's, or just fucking read something, there is no denying what is going on now. To the mindless Republicans who support government corruption (and unintentionally the destruction of your own party) because they dont want to see the ugly truth. I say pull your heads out of your asses and fight for your parties true values. Think for yourselves, and do what I say. Vote McCain.

One last little bit...
McCain pushed a bill through congress abolishing torture. Bush says we need to be able to torture people. Then McClellan makes a claim today that Bush doesnt support ANY American performing torture. C'mon, I know these are the droids I am looking for, your jedi mind tricks wont work on me anymore.

The Four Types of Naggers

2005-11-01T12:55:00.000-05:00

I got this from a friend, great stuff....

A female nagger can be classified in one of four groups:

The Innocent: This is the one nagger that doesn't really mean to nag. She brings up problems that she has to make you aware of, but tries to do so without making you angry or starting an argument. Chances are her intentions are good, she just needs a little work on her approach.

The Chatterbox: This nagger never seems to stop. But her nagging rarely escalates into real fights because you've probably learned to effectively zone her out (by the way, this is a good method; just don't let her catch you).

The Riddler: Ah, the nagger that nags without nagging (say that five times fast). She says things like, "Would you like to try and guess why the green plates are not in the cabinet?" You have no idea what she's talking about and she knows it, otherwise why would she be asking in the first place?

The T-Rex: If she doesn't rip your head off while screaming at you, you got away lucky. It seems as though she actually grows horns when the nagging starts, the room gets a little darker, you know it's coming and there's no place to run. Scientific studies conducted within laboratories showed conclusive evidence that she may very well be one of Satan's minions. Good luck with all that.

Now thats just not right

2005-11-01T09:54:00.000-05:00

Chavez warns of spooky US Halloween 'terrorism'
Oct 31 7:51 PM US/Eastern

President Hugo Chavez cautioned Venezuelan parents to protect their children from Halloween with a spooky warning that the US tradition is rooted in "terrorism."

"What they have implanted here, which is really a 'gringo' custom, is terrorism," Chavez said, quoted in the local press. "They disguise children as witches and wizards, that is contrary to our culture."

Chavez often lashes out at the US government, which he has described as "terrorist" and accused of plotting his assassination. But this time his warnings were directed at the American celebration that combines costumes and candy.

He issued "an appeal for reflection by parents" not to encourage their children to dress up for the holiday.

His comments came after authorities in Caracas recently seized pumpkins, cardboard skeleton costumes and other traditional Halloween items inscribed with anti-Chavez messages.
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Going after Bush, sure, that is a hobby for Chavez. We have come to expect it. Kicking out christian missionaries who subvert local culture through direct bribery? Sure why not, but attacking Halloween? C'mon man, thats just un-American. Seriously though, Halloween is rooted in Terrorism? The fallacy in his logic defies all good sense. How does he build that bridge of reasoning?

It is entertaining to watch his antics sometimes. On the world stage he is quite the card. Like when he got Jesse Jackson to meet with him after one of our biggest fundamentalists called for his assasination. But Halloween is where I draw the line. What is he trying to say, that non-'gringos' cant participate in the holiday? Or that children hide grenades in their little plastic pumpkins when they go trick or treating? Im not upset, but this Bush strategy of creating a sense of impending danger to make the people feel compelled to follow him is getting old.

He should get a better domestic strategist. Perhaps one who is ok with people having freedom to assemble or writing whatever they want on thier costumes.

Happy All Hallow's Eve

2005-10-31T09:44:00.000-05:00

Aka - All Saint's Day
Aka - Samhain
Aka - Halloween

Yes, it is here! The time when the wheel of seasons turns. The time in the old days which marked the beginning of winter and the dying of the old year. The beginning of the world's hibernation and additionally, the time when the veil between the spirit and physical world's are at thier thinnest. When the spirits of the dead can cross over and settle affairs of the past.

They say this is also the time when that stingy old Irish bastard, Jack, wanders the lands of the dead. Holding in front of him his ghostly lantern, a pumpkin (or turnip) with a burning coal from hell lighting it up from the inside. Ole Scaley tossed it at him when he banished wily Jack from entering the gates of hell. Since he was also banned from heaven, Jack wanders the roads of the dead, forever searching for a place to put up his boots. His way lit by that hellish lamp. Otherwise known as the Jack-o-Lantern.

Legend also has it that on this day and night the spirits of the dead wander the lands in greater numbers. To protect themselves, villagers would give themselves horrific countenances to ward off thier spectral callers. The tradition still lives on in a hybrid form now, with people wearing scary costumes on this holiday.

While we may not regard this day in the same way society of old has, I think it is still appropriate. If this is indeed the marking of our entry into winter, and our recognition of the nights ghostly traffic. Then revelry honoring traditions of old on this eve, and celebrating the vitality of our life is indeed a worthy persuit of the day. Our time is short enough on this earth as it is, best not to waste it as curmudgeons. My suggestion is to think on this when planning your evening. Kudos to you who have read this far, I wish you the flush of inspiration on this All Hallow's Eve.

One smidgen of text I think is quite evocative:

Empty your heart of its mortal dream.
The winds awaken, the leaves whirl round,
Our cheeks are pale, our hair is unbound,
Our breasts are heaving our eyes are agleam,
Our arms are waving our lips are apart;
And if any gaze on our rushing band,
We come between him and the deed of his hand,
We come between him and the hope of his heart.

No Torture in my name!

2005-10-26T17:25:00.000-04:00

Check this... my comments are below...

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Cheney and Torture

Charlie Savage writes in the Boston Globe: "Senator John McCain yesterday warned that a push by the White House to exempt overseas CIA agents from a proposed ban on mistreating prisoners in US custody would exacerbate the problem of detainee abuse by giving interrogators legal authority to torture suspected terrorists. . . . .

"McCain went public with his concerns after published reports yesterday that Vice President Dick Cheney met with him to urge changes to his widely supported proposal to outlaw cruel and degrading treatment of detainees by any US official. Cheney suggested exempting CIA counter-terrorism agents working overseas, but McCain balked."

The Washington Post editorial boardtoday minces no words: "Vice President Cheney is aggressively pursuing an initiative that may be unprecedented for an elected official of the executive branch: He is proposing that Congress legally authorize human rights abuses by Americans . . . .

"The Senate's earlier vote suggests that it will not allow such a betrayal of American values. As for Mr. Cheney: He will be remembered as the vice president who campaigned for torture."
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Now im no legal expert, but im pretty sure that cruel and unusual punishment is illegal in the United States. Im also no fan of cowards who willfully murder innocent men, women and children. I recognize that some of these terrorists have information we need to aquire for national security purposes, but there are some things that seperate us from those animals. Humanity is one of them.

My opinion of Cheney wasnt that high before, but even I thought he was less base than this. As an American citizen I say enough is enough. No torture in my name. No desecration of religions in my name. I'll take my chances with being humane. America should set an example to follow, not to scorn. Unfortunately, our executive branch seems to want to take us down a darker path. Thankfully, some of our representatives, like McCain are standing up for what is right.

Such high level endorsement of torture shames us as a nation. Its about damn time that someone stood up to these jackbooted white house staffers. It is also good to see Republicans actually doing what is right. This has been too long in coming.

I never thought id see the day

2005-10-26T13:46:00.000-04:00

Empires are afeared my friends.

Bush is battling for his political life. His supreme court nominee is being neutered by the GOP. His aides are close to being indicted and sacked. His war is losing public support. Our national debt is out of control due to many of his fiscal decisions. The scales are falling from the poeples eyes and his support is lower than ever. I almost feel bad for him, until i think of how much he has screwed our country. 'Lion in Winter' my ass. More like monkey getting his just desserts.

Then you have Microsoft. Embattled on all sides and facing the prospect of being eclipsed by Google in key markets. Who woulda thought? MS is actually banding together with Yahoo of all things to try and combat Google and thier crazy technology. Now, im not a Microsoft hater like many, but I dont mind them being force to be competitive.

A farewell to kings indeed.

Movie Review: Batman Begins

2005-10-25T11:53:00.000-04:00

I give this movie 3 out of 5. Thats right, 60%, meaning it is just ok. Im so tired of seeing people running about and ranting that this is such a great movie. It isnt. For those of you who think it is, I have something for you. Here is a quarter, go buy some taste. Then go back and watch the movie again.

Now that that is over with. Let me get to the movie. It was not bad per se. There were definately some very entertaining moments in it. The scene where he summons the bats was different from previous batman movies. It was inventive, yet fit with the overall genre. This was a good thing. Bale doing a suedo Two Face/Batman routine where he changed voices when he put on the Batman suit just drove me well... batty. I mean c'mon, watch out, he's using the grr.. I am the dark knight voice. Bad guys beware. It was silly, and unnecessary.

Moving on. The wench. Holmes looks good, but I didnt feel that she was the right girl for the role. She was decent, but they could have put many a young actress in there and had the same results. Now our villain, he was inspiring! He did the job of giving you that 'I want to wash myself after meeting him' feeling. Overall, it was a decent movie. Worth renting at home. Id put it next to orginal batman. Hey, at least it was better than that one batman with clooney and his nipple suit.

Ruminations on Dumb People

2005-10-24T11:16:00.000-04:00

I am sure you have heard this expression "I hate dumb people" or its clever brother "I hate stupid people". For those of you who agree I say - Fuck you. For those who roll their eyes at the sniveling whiners who utter such declarations I applaud you. What really drives me hatchet mad about this exclamation is the fact that those who utter it generally do so out of irrational vexation. I mean really, someone is driving slower than you like, so they are stupid? Someone performed a minor gaffe so now they are slow of mind? Since when did these people become such sagacious monitors of the human condition?

That crap pisses me off to no end. To quote "There's only two things I hate in this world. People who are intolerant of other people's cultures and the Dutch." Well toss these winners on that list as well. Now, for those of you who realize that you dont really mean what you say in your mad fits of deprication, I say I understand. We all make mistakes. For those of you who dare to presume you hold some special place in the genetic pool of mankind I say look to your own house you asshat. Take some advice from a hypocritical bastard like me and stop being intolerant.

Hello World!

2005-10-24T10:38:00.000-04:00

#include

void main(void)
{
char *message[] = {"Hello ", "World"};
int i;
for(i = 0; i < 2; ++i)
printf("%s", message[i]);
printf("\n");
}

Yes, this is a launching post for me to spew forth every bilious
thought that passes through my sleep deprived mind. Beware and
tremble in awe...